Monthly Archives: May 2008

My own personal Soup

I’m a big fan of The Soup on E!  I don’t know why.  Maybe it’s Joel McHale, maybe it’s because I’m a pop culture junkie.  Or maybe, just maybe, it’s because the shit they talk about is usually the same (or similar) shit I think about on a daily basis.

I’ve always said that my ideal career is to be a travel writer, but now I’m thinking it would be a writer for The Soup.  I’ve also spent quite a bit of quality couch time this weekend, so I actually have some good material. If I were writing for the Soup this week, I would talk about:

Groomer Has It there’s a reality TV show on Animal Planet about dog groomers.  Yep, that’s right.  It’s like someone saw the success of competition-based reality shows and decided to pitch something to the Animal Planet. I can just imagine the pitch meeting now: “It’s like Project Runway meets Meerkat Manor.”  Crazy.  There were even people talking about “razor skills” and “scissor” skills… much like knife skills on Top Chef.  The contestants live in a DOG HOUSE and are competing to be on the cover of a professional grooming magazine.  To each their own, I guess.  I watched it twice.  Once for the WTF factor and another time because there was literally nothing but infomercials on at 3 am.

Those Charmin commercials— Okay, it’s bad enough that they’re playing on the whole “does a bear shit in the woods” controversy by featuring cartoon bears as their “spokespeople,” but the most recent batch of commercials deals with Charmin’s apparent superiority over other brands of toilet paper because it leaves fewer “pieces” behind.   Okay, I realize that this kind of thing happens.  But do we really need to hear about it in a commercial?  Did their market research tell them that the reason someone chooses Quilted Northern over Charmin has something to do with getting TP stuck to your ass???   If so, who was the marketing genius who decided that having a bear dust off his ass on TV is gonna make me want to buy something?  Seriously!

Good Samaritan

I’ve decided to stay home all weekend.  Yep, that’s right. I’m spending an entire weekend at home. By myself.  With the dog.  Instead of having happy hour last night, I made the girls come over here and it was actually a reallygood time.

My dog had surgery yesterday, so I’m sticking close to home to keep an eye on her. During one of our short trips outside, I saw another little dog coming down the street.  Without a leash.  He came ACROSS THE STREET into my yard, so I picked him up and took him inside.  His name was Pickles and he had a phone number on his tag, so I called.  No response, so I left a message.  Here are some photos of Pickles:


The owner called back.  Apparently she lives in Virginia and her partner still lives here, but her partner is also out of town, so they’re having a friend dog sit.  She gives me the friend’s phone number, but he isn’t home either, so me, my dog, and Pickles all hang out together for a while.   My dog didn’t quite know what to think of Pickles, especially since she’s ‘injured,’ but it worked out.  The owners friend came to pick up Pickles and all was well.

I think that this, combined with the LAST time I took in a stray dog and my reporting of the possible child endangerment qualifies me as a Good Samaritan.

Let’s Talk about Stats, baby!

I was going to do another morning freewrite when I logged onto wordpress, checked my blog stats (as I do obsessively 3 or 4 times a day!).  So I decided to scrap the freewriting idea and focus on the sexiest idea I could think of–blog stats!!

Even before logging in, I was anticipating what I would find.   I’ve been getting really high hits because  I “borrowed” a couple of photos: one for a post on Lost and the other for a poetry post.   A poetry post describing my dislike for poetry, nonetheless. Yesterday was my “best day ever” in terms of blog stats.  Funny, ‘cuz I didn’t post anything yesterday.  Go figure!

Now, I’m happy that *anyone* is coming to my blog.  And I’m thrilled that people are looking at my Lost stuff, if even for a moment.  But that poetry post was a complete throwaway… Yeah, the image is super cool, but I just don’t get why people are coming to it.

I know that in the blogging world, it’s all about the numbers. How many hits, how many subscribers, etc., etc. But that was never my intention, which makes it even more ironic that I’m obsessed with that little bar graph.  I doubt that I have many regular readers.  I get more comments on my mySpace blog than I do here, but what tickles me is when I open my blog stats and see REAL stuff.  Yeah, it’s only 4 or 5 hits, but I think it’s cool that:

  • There is a Yahoo group devoted to Henry Ian Cusick, and they were talking about my blog, if only for a day
  • The guy at SF Signal agreed with my reasoning for loving Lost
  •  At least a few people are reading this from their Google readers and myYahoo feeds

I’m not really sure I want to “market” this blog.  Yes, I love to see that little line spike high, but this blog is a mismash, it doesn’t have purpose, it doesn’t have a defined angle.  Hell, it doesn’t even have good writing most of the time.   But I do love it when people stumble upon me, so I think I’ll go ahead and link to those uber-popular images again, so maybe–just maybe– someone might read this as well!

I’m Thinking Of…

My friend who lost his dad…  He was only 60 years old. An alcoholic, but a good guy.  And his mom died years ago.  Now my friend doesn’t have *any* parents.  What’s that like at 29? I mean, my MOM still has a mother.  Yeah, she has Alzheimer’s and is in the hospital right now.  But she’s still alive.  Shit, my DAD still has a mother  and he’s almost 65.  Why does my grandma get to live until she’s 90 while this guy’s dad kicks the bucket at 60????

What’s it like being 29 years old and an orphan?  Especially when you don’t have a very close relationship with your sister?  As a side note, my brother just said: “and it’s not like he’s close to his sister.”  That kinda made me all warm and fuzzy inside.  Like my bro realizes what we have is special.

Back to what I’m thinking of. Mortality. Death. The futility of life.  But, it is what you make of it, right?  I don’t want to turn out like that poor soul.  Alcoholic and alone.  But, what am I right now?  Alone and drunk with 3 dogs running around and my *mom* delivering me Taco Bell!  Is that pathetic?  

I don’t usually sit around drinking by myself, but I figured I had nothing better to do.  Does this mean that in 11  years my kids are gonna find me passed out in a diabetic coma?  Are the papers gonna get my survivors’ names wrong?  What will my legacy be?   Let’s hope it’s not this.

Wow… that’s some deep shit.  All because of drunken web surfing. 

I’m looking at…

I stole this idea from  I’ll totes give her credit.

I’m looking at 30.  Yeah, that’s right. I’m getting fucking old.  One of those legendary stories growing up was how, at the age of 3 or 4, I said that Madonna should retire from being a singer because she was 30. Because she was ancient.  And here I am… 29 years old… turning 30 in a mere 9 months.

I don’t feel ancient. In fact, I don’t feel grown up.  I have a house. A dog. A mortgage. Shit, I’m dog sitting my moms pups tonight.  But I’m plowed.  Ruby Red Absolut + Fresca + Top Chef = One Hell of a Wednesday Night in my book.

So, if we take the question more literally, what amI looking at?  Well, the computer screen, obviously.  And my reflection in the mirror.  Since I was a little girl I’ve always been obsessed with my own appearance.  Not too bad, I say… maybe a little pale.  Definitely a little pudgier than I was last year.  But I’m a cute girl… or so I tell myself.

What else do I see?  I see a futon.  I see purses.  I see a room that needs to be cleaned.   I hear dogs in the other room playing with something they’re not supposed to.  Maybe I should go check on them.

So the dogs were in their crates. Good puppies.  Then my brother called to say he sold his house. Yay!

Now I’m looking at my dog and the black dog fighting.  This isn’t as interesting as I thought it would be.  I’ll try again later.  Maybe when I’m sober.

Why I Heart Lost

It’s no secret… I’m addicted to Lost.   Not since my pre-teen Family Ties days have I been so enthralled with a television show.  Although there have been plenty of shows that I’ve watched since, none have quite captured my interest like this one.  It’s honestly the *only* show I religiously watch every week.  So what is it about this show that makes it so great?  Is it the characters? The plot? The mystery? 

Since there is no Lost  this week, I’ve decided to break down the top 5 reasons I heart Lost:

5)  Naveen Andrews, Josh Holloway, Henry Ian Cusick– A top 4 list isn’t quite as catchy as a Top 5 list, so I had to throw some eye-candy in here.  The actors who portray Sayid, Sawyer, and Desmond are-in a word- HOTT!  I’m not a big Jack fan, but he cleans up nice.  And the girls are okay, too.  Kate is a bit too horse-like for my taste, but I totally dig Juliet.  Can’t go wrong with pretty people on a pretty island.

4)  It makes me feel smart.  And then stupid.  And then smart again.  Like any good mystery, Lost is filled with clues, red herrings, villains, heroes and “WTF just happened?” moments.  It makes me feel smart when I figure something out (like Juliet’s real purpose last season) and then stupid again when I realize I just “fell” for one of the producers’ tricks… they wanted me to put two and two together.

There are so many layers to the show… there are pop culture references, literary references, an entire mythology that  is derived from what the producers refer to as the “canon.”  Some things (the show itself, official podcasts, webisodes, etc.) are considered to be part of the canon and, therefore, presented as truth.  Other things (actors’ interviews, an alternate reality game, unofficial web sites) are non-canonical and can’t be completely trusted, but provide a great source of information for the theory-makers.

3) There’s a little something for everyone—  Action, romance, mystery, science fiction, psychology, hippies, sex, drugs, rock and roll (well… there was Rock & Roll), mysticism, religion, animals, family drama… and HUMOR.  Don’t forget the humor.   Hurley and Sawyer, in particular, are great at delivering the witty one-liner.  Even if you don’t think you like science fiction (I don’t) or aren’t “into” all the mystery-making, you’ll find something to glom onto.

In talking to people about this season it became clear to me that different people identify with different aspects of the show.  Some people are concerned about what is happening RIGHT NOW on the show– are they gonna find the chopper?  What’s up with that thing on Keemy’s arm? (I’m trying to be as vague as possible), whereas I’m less interested in the action of the island and more interested in how the “current” events weave into the larger context of the show.  It’s like a big puzzle and even though I don’t know how all the pieces will fit together, I have confidence that the writers are taking us somewhere… somewhere amazing!

2) The writers/producers are amazing.  I have no clue what it takes to write a television series, especially one as complex and multi-layered as this one.  But these writers are God-like in my book.  They started the series with the “island present”/flashback format.  Through this we were able to meet and identify with the characters, while also moving the story forward and giving us background on both the characters and the plot.  They’ve also managed to introduce new characters (sometimes not-so-successfully) in a way that propelled the story forward, yet maintained the core of the show.  I have to remind myself that some of my favorite characters– Ben, Desmond, Juliet– weren’t even on the show the first season. 

And then the changed it all  up at the end of the last season. I’m not going to ruin for anyone, but it was mind-blowing.  And by all accounts, there’s another mind-shift happening at the end of this season.  Brilliant!

They’ve also managed to make a fairly fast-paced, mythology-driven show that actually has compelling *characters.*  Too often in “genre” shows, the writers rely on the tried-and-true devices of the genre and don’t focus as much on character development.  I think Lost has proven itself to be *much* more than a genre show by giving the characters such depth.  Sure, it’s taken 4 years for some characters (Sawyer is just coming into his own) while others seem fairly stock (Jack), but I don’t think we ever saw this kind of character development on, say, Star Trek.  

While we’re on the subject, I refuse to classify this as science fiction. Yeah, there are some otherworldly things going on here.  But it’s soooooo much more than that.  Plus, I hate sci fi!

1) The Lost Community–  Now, if nothing else I ever do doesn’t brand me a dork, this will:  I think my favorite part of watching Lost is the day-after.  Yes, it’s a water-cooler show.  And yes, I’m glad it’s on Thursday now so that I don’t feel *quite* so guilty discussing it with my friends/co-workers on Friday.  

But, again, it’s so much more than that.  There’s a whole community built around this show.  I consider myself a pretty big fan.  I usually read the blogs the next day to catch up on the latest theory/obscure reference I’ve missed.  Hell, I’ve even started taking LIVE notes and sharing them with fellow “Losties” via email.  But I’m NO WHERE near as devoted as some of the people online.

The likes of Doc Jensen, Doc Arzt and that guy from Powells (J. Wood, apparently) spend a great deal of time and energy researching the show, making sense of every bit of dialogue, imagery, and context.   And those guys get paid for it.  There are hundreds, if not thousands, of regular people who do it just for fun.  

Take the first episode where we met the “freighter people” for example.   I watched the show and thought: “hmmm…that redheaded actress is kinda pretty, wonder what’s up with her.”  The Lost faithful immediately realized that her name was c.s. lewis, the author of the Chronicles of Narnia.  And then made a million connections to why that was significant and what it means to the larger context of the show.  And that, my friends is why I love the show.   As Lenny Kravitz once said: “It ain’t over till it’s over.”  And with Lost, it ain’t never over! 

So, if you’re already a Lost  fan, let’s talk in a couple of weeks about what is bound to be a mind-blowing finale.  And if you’re not… rent the DVDs and get caught up.  You won’t be disappointed!

It’s been a while…

I haven’t done one of these freewrites for a while.  As usual, I have lots of stuff going through my head.

My dog has to have surgery.

I hope I’m making the right choice.

I  don’t have any money.

How did I manage to piss away my entire stimulus check without knowing it?  I

‘m trying to do some laundry. I need to clean. I have no plans for the long weekend.

There are countless unread books and unwatched movies at my house.

I’m bored at work.

I had a fun weekend, but I’m still not caught up on my sleep.

I’m having weird stomach issues.

I hate cold sores.

The dryer is buzzing.

I don’t want to go to work.

I’m annoyed by my coworkers.

My office is a mess.

I’m not smoking.

I’m probably drinking more.

My friend’s dad died, but I’m not sure the details yet.

I want to write a blog about why I heart Lost.

There were lots of inaccuracies in my last Lost blog.

I’ve had more interesting things to say before.

But I can’t seem to think of any now.

I don’t know how to fill up this 15 minutes.

So I’ll stop.

Lost, again!

I wasn’t wild about last night’s episode.  Yeah, it moved the story along, but I found it a little too melodramatic and cheesy.  I’ve been thinking a lot about Lost lately and I have a theory as to why I like it so much.  If I get a chance later today, I’ll write about it.  If not, maybe next week… since there is no episode–boo!

At any rate, I went back to my play-by-play note taking last night… so here goes:

May 15, 2008—Lost

“There’s no place like home”

Previously on lost– secondary protocol.  Torch the island.  Gas up the chopper, frank.  Drops care package.  Jack—“I think they want us to follow them”   Christian can speak on Jacobs behalf.  He wants us to move the island

Clouds… through window of plane.  Who is the pilot?  Helicopter/chopper ahead. 

What was the chicks name?  A little air back there.

We’re coming in for a landing… jack, Hurley. Sun, Kate, Sayid.  Military facility west of Honolulu.  As far as oceanic is concerned… don’t have to speak to reporters

Kate has Aaron.. Already looking like his mom

Jack is speaking for everyone… shocking

Not the best branding as far as we’re concerned.  She must be from oceanic.

Jack is in a suit.  We all know the story .   Keep our mouths shut if we get any questions we don’t want to answer… or can’t answer

We are in shock jack.– Sun

Well, then this should be easy… uh, yeah… right!

Plane lands…. Why are they in the back? In the “freight” area and not up front with the oceanic lady?… coast guard plane.

But they have seat belts?  Hrm

They see the light as the doors open.  Clearly a metaphor.  Slow mo reconciliation with families.  Sun’s parents.  Hurley’s mom.  Jacks’ mom (?)  have we seen her before?

Who is there for Kate?  For Sayid?

Hurly introduces Sayid to his p’s. of course.

I have tears.  Poor Late.  She’s still looking very horse like.

Rose thinks its Sayid and Desmond in the chopper.

I heart faraday

The orchid- Juliet claims to not know what it is

Jack and Kate take a walk.  Juliet tries to stop him

“ill see ya in a couple of hours”  jack to Juliet

Daniel and charlotte know of the orchid. Of the secondary protocol.

Daniel—“we have to get off this island…. Right now!”

Kate is sweaty.  Jack is bleeding.

Kate is skinny.

What’s in the bushes?  Oh. It’s miles.

“Long time. No see”

Sawyer. Aaron.  Are they dead?  Please tell me sawyer isn’t dead. 

We lost Claire.  She walked off in the middle of the night.  She was just gone.

New otherton.  Sawyer is on Locke’s side?

Broken record.  This is the start of Kate taking Aaron.

Kate looks really really thin. 

Sawyer: ‘you don’t get to die alone”  (Live together/die alone)


Day 103… typhoon washed up a boat w/ a raft

Sumba.  Manukanga.

Ms. Austin’s baby… gave birth on the island.

Plane hit the ocean ?

Plane filled up with water.  Emergency door.  Got out before it went down.

Cushions, life jackets.  Current pulled them in. Only 8 left.

You look pretty healthy.  Cheech is in the audience.

“on the island” 

The answer is no… Jin never made it off the plane

Kate was 6 months pregnant

Absolutely not possible that there are others to be discovered.

Woman wants to meet with sayid.  Nadia?????  Code name?

I have chills.

Sayid in boat by himself.  Headed to island.

Meets beach people.  Desmond is on the freighter.

Men on helicopter have every intention of killing us all.  Jack and Kate went running after it.

Going to the orchid. It’s a greenhouse.  According to john we’re going to move the island.  Very carefully. Doing it is dangerous and unpredictable.  It’s a measure of last resort.  What does Ben see on the ground?  A pack of some sort?  A trunk.

“allow me” – john

Dharma cigar box?  (‘you keep your weed in it’)

Ben-mirror.  Locke-binocs

Communicating with the island?  Jacob?

“none of your business john”

Sayid is looking to Juliet for advice?

“I trust you know the bearing”

Kate gives Aaron to Sun  “keep him safe”

Charlotte looks sad that Daniel is leaving.

“this is just the first trip”  who is on the boat?  Sun, Daniel, Jin, aaron,

“I told you I’d get you off the island”— Jin to Sun

PG Sun in big building.  Paik industries.

Sun is badass with her dad.

Ooh… corporate takeover??  Go Sun Go!

Two people are responsible.  Daddy dearest and….  Charles Widmore?

I hate commercials.  Seriously.

Muscle car. Must be hugo.

Chicken shack bag.

Mr. tron. Lady tron. Coconut.  Charlie?

Tv is on… I’m getting scared

Use the Virgin Mary statue

Why am I doin this???

Surprise… it’s your luau party (???)

Jesus Christ is not a weapon

Kate is there.  Hapy bday hurley.

Nadia and sayid are there.  Mom doesn’t get it dude. 

‘buildin a fire; hunting boars’  –lord of the flies reference

Car is fixed.  Cheech worked on it as a memorial piece.  Now you’re back. And it’s all yours.  Take it for a lil spin…

Ah, shit.  Those damn numbers.  4. 8. 15. 16. 24. 32

Hurley is running

‘I’m working on it’

It’s a little late to get off the island, hugo…  Been creeps me out.  Down low to the ground.

We’re at the orchid.

Charles Whidmore knows about this place and knows what is inside.  I wasn’t being entirely truthful.

Hm…. There are people there.

Do I want to see the new Indiana Jones movie?  I don’t really know……

It’s interesting they’re not using the whole name.  just “Indiana jones”

Who are those random people on the boat?

Daniel is heading back for the next group.

Sun/jin see Michael

Bearing of 305

Something on this boat is broadcasting

Jack and sawyer at chopper.   Lapedius.  Says he’s gonna fly them out of here.  Is handcuffed to plane.


Hit squad is gonna grab Ben Linus.

Sawyer and laepedius look like they cold be related.

Jack is talking at his fathers funeral. The only good thing about a wake is the free booze.

What I want to say isn’t for my dad. It’s for me.  Bye dad. I love you.

Mr. Sheppard. Very sorry for  your loss.  Claire’s mom? 

The reason she’s in Australia when he died.

He came to see his daughter. My daughter.  Check phone records.

Strangest thing… my daughter was on your plane, too.  You never even knew she was your sister.  One who died.  Her name was Claire.  I’m sorry for your loss.  Your son is beautiful. Thank you.

Creepy music.

And now you’re working for Ben.   I do not work for Ben—Michael. Trying to help you out here.


Explosives galore.  They send Sun away.  Apparently girls + explosives do not mix

When did Kate become an epert tracker.

Richard Alpert.

I feel like this has happened before.

Ooh… Richard is badass, too.

The one who killed alex is there.

Go into that greenhouse.  Through the hole.  Turn left  anthureums.  Switch that activates the elevator. Elevator takes you to the actual station.  Ben always has a plan.


Ben going out to danger/ sun going out to danger.  Baby Aaron.

It’s like marching into battle.  The last stand. 

What is that plant? Surely its significant.

Ben is giving himself up. 

Keemy is creepy. 

My name is Benjamin Linus.  I believe you’re looking for me.

My name is Inyingo Mantoya.  You killed my father. Prepare to die.


2 hour season finale.   Jack/Locke/Ben.  Breathtaking.

Thank god its on early.

Permanent Adolescence

I’m not 100% sure where this post will take me, but I’ve had a bunch of thoughts running through my head the last few days and I feel the need to get them out.  Maybe I’ll edit it later.  Maybe not.

I wrote a list of “things to do with my life” on the plane the other day.  I couldn’t find a piece of paper so I found an ad in my magazine with the most amount of white space and just started furiously writing… curiously enough, the ad was for Ketel One vodka.  I’m sure that’s somehow significant.  If I can get to a scanner, I’ll post it.  Very interesting.

I don’t know what my problem is.  I’m not unhappy. I’m not depressed.  I’m not anxious.  I’m just, well, restless.  I feel like life is passing me by and that there has to be something more fun/exciting/INTERESTING to do.  But I don’t know what it is.

I feel like I’m in a permanent adolescence.  I keep WAITING for my life to start.  To “happen.”   I spent my high school years working towards getting into college.  In college, I spent time working towards getting a “good job”  in the “real world.”  Now that I have that, I want more.  But what, exactly, do I want?

A boyfriend?

A different job?


I honestly don’t know.  I don’t think just another job/change of pace is going to be enough.  I feel like I need a whole different lifestyle.  A different ME.   Maybe that’s what it is… I’m bored with myself.

Ugh.  What a horrible thought.

I knew I was bored.  Lately I’ve been finding my work boring, my friends boring, even my “fun” boring… but have *I* become boring to myself as well?   And is there anything worse that boring YOURSELF?

I realize there are real problems in this world, but I feel like I’m just spinning my wheels waiting for something to happen to me.    Yeah, I have a lot of “fun.”  I have great friends, lots of plans… but am I using that just to bide my time?  Where is the meaning?

Lately I’ve been thinking I should go back to school. Become an academic.  I just think that world is better suited to me.  But I don’t have anything I like well enough to devote that much time to it.  Maybe my practicality is getting the better of me.

Then I think maybe I’ll follow my long-lost dream of joining the Peace Corps. It’s only 2 years.  But then WHAT?  Will I be 2 years “behind”?  Will what I gain from that experience make up for all that I’ll be missing here?

There’s that famous quote (maybe from Elanor Roosevelt?) about doing something every day that scares you.  Have I become so complacent that I’m not working with “the Fear” anymore?  What’s the worst that would happen to me?

I need an adventure. Something I can really sink my teeth into.  Not staining the fence or painting the garage.  Not going on a solo trip out East (although I’m seriously reconsidering that one at this point).  I need to do something meaningful… adventurous… interesting.

Do I sound like a broken record yet? It’s the same old thing… but I don’t know where to start. I guess the fact that there’s no “magic” answer is what’s killing me.  There’s no playbook.  No script.  I’ve been following the predetermined script of my life for so long, I don’t know how to get off.  I just mixed my metaphors.  But you know what I mean.

I sound like a whiny bitch.  I get it.  But maybe just recognizing the problem will bring me one step closer to solving it.  Whatever that means.

Holy Dead People, Batman

I watched half of tonight’s episode of Lost from between my fingers. This was one of those “creepy” episodes and it didn’t disappoint.

To recap, we get another Locke flashback. We learn the details of his birth: unwed teenage mother gets hit by a car and delivers baby early. Is considered a miracle child. Richard Alpert visits in the hospital. He visits a number of years later to administer a “test” to a young Locke. He fails. He then attempts to recruit lost to his “science camp” in Portland… So Locke truly is a man of science after all. Hmmm….

Back on the freighter, Michael gets beat up for ratting out Keemy to Ben. The captain helps out Sayid and Desmond. Sayid takes off in a boat. Des stays behind. The doctor is still alive (!?!). There’s a weird timing thing going on. A couple episodes back, it seemed as if the island was BEHIND in time (remember Faraday’s experiment) and now it seems they are ahead. Hmmm…..

The major drama, however, was in the Locke/Ben/Hurley storyline. They’re looking for Jacob. Locke has a dream where he runs into Horace Godspeed. Who is dead. And has been for 12 years. Totally creeped me out. Ben said that he used to have dreams. He used to be the “chosen” one. And now he’s passing the torch to Locke? Doubtful. THere are also some other strange connections here. Locke tells Ben he’s sorry about his spine and his daughter. Then they cut to Locke in the hospital recovering from his broken back. Coincidence? I think not.

After his dream, Locke leads Hurley and Ben to the mass Dharma grave, where he looks for Horace’s body. He finds a map. Bingo. Cabin. Locke tells Hugo he can go. He chooses to stay. Total Ben move. When Locke says that he’s not Ben, Ben says “clearly.” Definitely significant.

Once at the cabin, Locke goes in alone. He talks to Christian who says he can “speak on behalf” of the elusive Jacob. And then reveals that Claire is there. Aaron is “where he needs to be.” Creep-y. Seriously. Locke asks a bunch of questions and Christian says they aren’t important now. THe only important question is how can we save the island.

The last scene in the movie is of Locke saying that they need to MOVE the island to save it. Seriously creepy.

So…. Claire *is* dead, then? And there’s clearly some sort of metaphysical apparition thing going on. But why? And who is “chosen” to be an apparition and who is chosen to have one?

I don’t think it’s just the crazy people, as Hurley suggested (although that was one of my fave lines tonight). Claire and Christian are both related to Jack. Jack is the man of science. He is the one who is sick. Jack is a nickname for John. There’s something to this. I just don’t know what.

And WTF is up with Richard Alpert? We already know he’s ageless, but so far we know that he is directly responsible for bringing Juliet to the island, he encouraged Ben in the Purge, he gave Locke Sawyer’s file to get him to convince Sawyer to kill his dad. And now this stuff with Locke???

And how bout that beyond creepy scene with Abbadon? Do you think *he* could be Jacob? Creepy McCreeperson.

I LOVED this episode, but I have a feeling I’ll have a hard time sleeping tonight!